Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
