So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize
