I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Randomize
