forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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