So drunk its hurt
haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
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