So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
