Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I still have a little drunk in my system
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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