ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
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