Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Randomize
