Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
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