I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Randomize
