we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
Randomize
