I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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