Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Randomize
