She said her name was "party"
Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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