Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
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