This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
