I want to stick my p in your. b.
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
