I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
