I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy�
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize
