Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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