Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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