belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I'm jealous of your bromance
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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