If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
I want her autograph on my taint
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
