dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Randomize
