And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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