Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Randomize
