handjob tips. give me some.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
Randomize
