Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
Randomize
