My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
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