Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize