so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
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