In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
I forgot wine drunk hurts
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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