check it out our google latitudes are spooning
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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