ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Randomize
