You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Randomize
