I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
