I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Randomize
