Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
How external is "for external use only"?
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize
