Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
