You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
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