I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
We smell like vodka and hangover
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