My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
third nipple confirmed
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
