No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
