He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
I'm experimenting with sincerity
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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