Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
