fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
