Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
