I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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