Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize
